Malaprops

This is the kind of typographical error that clearly indicates a total lack of proofreading. This is also the kind of error that automated spell-checkers do not catch.

bad

not good

mitten

a covering for the hand enclosing the four fingers together and the thumb separately

Seen in

the simple cross that bared the name of his wife upon it

Note: With bore, the quote should omit upon it, which is assumed.

It's a wheel barrow, not a wheel barrel.

Seen in: It was also the moment when dad proudly beamed Nicole to be his 'official' grandchild.

Seen in: Congratulations to you, Mr. Johnston on behave of the board.

Seen in: Chad told me that I'd better not behaving too much fun.

This is an excellent example of two real words being changed into a third real but unrelated word by the accidental omission of the space between them. Since all the words here are real, no spell-checker would be able to find the error.

Seen in bend in meaning hide in a crowd

Seen in he was biting his time.

The phrase is biding his time, meaning waiting for an opportune moment.

Possibly an erroneous attempt to combine brute and blunt

blunt force —
blunt: having a thick edge or point, as an instrument; dull, not sharp
Thus, force with a blunt weapon

Seen in carbine copy

Carbon soot is used to make carbon paper, which was extensively used to make copies of typed documents before the advent of xerographic copiers — thus the term carbon copy, referring to any identical copy of an original, including copies of non-documentary objects or even persons (e.g., a child who looks very much like a parent).

The phrase is seize the moment (carpe diem, which is Latin for seize the day). To cease the moment would be to stop the clock.

[used in chassis lounge: where an automobile frame relaxes?]

(See also chic and sheik under Homonyns)

Seen in chalk full, the correct phrase is chock full, meaning "completely full". However, the phrase …he chocked it up to it's the way things are should instead be …he chalked it up to it's the way things are.

(These would be homonyms except that corral is accented differently from the other two.)

Seen in extra circular

closed: not open

cloths: pieces of fabric

While I could not determine what the author meant, it was clear from the context that condescended was definitely not the correct word.

Seen in a huge crab-claw bath

In this case, the writer was trying to describe an old-fashioned, free-standing bath tub that had claw feet.

Seen in: The fort was constructed, in part, after General Custard's defeat at Little Big Horn.

The phrase is carve a niche, not curve a niche

The next morning, we awoke to the smell of a big breakfast, mom style. After we made ourselves presentable, we sat at the table complementing on the spread already on the table. She said it was fun and actually missed cooking for more than herself. After decimating the contents on the table, we went over what we were going to do today.

Note that "decimated" does not mean totally destroyed; instead, it means 10% destroyed (from the root deci, meaning "one tenth"). Thus, what this author describes is leaving 90% of the food uneaten. He also keeps jumping between past and present tense in the same paragraph.

(See deseminated below.)

or perhaps

devastating(?): laying waste

[used in The elevator … started to make his slow descend [sic for descent] up. If the elevator were indeed going down, the correct word would have been descent without up.]

(See decimating above.)

A devining rod (not a diving rod) is supposedly used by a dowser (water witch) to locate a previously unknown spring or other source of water.

The piece of bedroom furniture is a chest of drawers, not chest of draws.

Seen in "…you took a long drive over a very steep cliff…"

Seen in duck tape. Duct tape is a adhesive cloth tape developed to join sections of ducts together and seal the joints.

Seen in He ducts into another room. Ducking from one place to another means to avoid being found in the first place.

Seen in The evening due to a close…

Seen in dumb truck

[Using one of these for another is a very common typographical error and indicates a total lack of proofreading.]

Seen in … deciding to fill for legal emancipation from her parents …

(I suspect the writer misspelled Phil and then accepted whatever his spell-checker suggested)

Thus, the phrase is to run the gantlet, meaning to traverse a route with danger close on both sides.

Seen in: Don't look a give horse in the mouth.

Based on the practice of checking a horse's teeth to estimate its age, the correct phrase is Don't look a gift horse in the mouth, meaning that you should not question the quality of a gift.

Seen in Spare us the grizzly details

Seen in: It was dark and took a few minutes to a gust from the out door summer brightness to the gloom of the bar.

Seen in: A judge conducted a herring. (a unique symphonic spectacle)

Seen in He honed in on my location

Seen in the phrase: there was only one huddle to cross

The correct phrase is there was only one hurdle to cross, reflecting the fact that a runner must successfully cross all the hurdles to win the race.

Seen in "raging infernal"

Seen in warm-up jacked

• knit: a frabic made by interlocking loops of a continuous strand of yarn or thread
• whit: speck, smallest possible particle

(The author may have written lent, which his spell-checker capitalized.)

This simple transposition of the letters n and e still yields a valid word. Both are nouns; thus, the substitution of lien for line is grammatically correct even if it makes no sense. This is another error that cannot be caught by either a spell-checker or a grammar-checker. Only human proofreading could catch this error. Other errors in the story where this was found indicate no such proofreading was done.

Seen in "mediocre of privacy"

Used in bare mid-drift.

Also seen as middrift, which is not a valid word.

Bare midriff describes casual clothing that covers the upper chest and lower abdomen but leaves the skin bare between

Seen in … by the time they bring the case to court, the case will be mute